Ordinary Time

Among the stories about Winnie the Pooh is one where Rabbit becomes tired of Tigger always bouncing and plots ways to "unbounce" him. Long story short, when Tigger does stop bouncing, Rabbit misses it and realizes the bouncy Tigger is best. Well, we had the Curry version of this story last week. TM is very bouncy, in fact we often call him Tigger. Sometimes to the point when my own Rabbit-like tendencies would wish he were just a bit less on the bouncy side. (Side note: I have a personal theory that all personality types are represented by Winnie the Pooh characters. I am pretty sure I am Rabbit. Try it.) I have also discovered that a bouncy TM is the preferable model. Last week TM wasn't feeling well, but instead of getting better, he just became sicker and more lethargic, so I finally took him to the doctor. Pneumonia. But blessedly, not a bad enough case to have him put in the hospital. During that week, J and I realized how used to the bouncy TM we had be...

(E) We are making progress with K's adoption. We were able to finish our dossier in record time and the VN consulate also moved quickly. As a result, not only has our dossier been submitted to the VN government, but it has also been approved! Now we move on to waiting for K's dossier to be approved at the provincial level. This is the long wait. Wait times for this province are 4 - 6 1/2 months. So, I guess I will just plan on it taking 6 months and be pleasantly suprised if it takes less. (It's so easy to say that, but I know the reality of waiting is so much more difficult.) In the meantime I will compulsively check my email waiting for the next update on K and start in on my stack of reading material to continue my crash course in cleft lips and palates.

I realize that I have never met you and that all I know about you is what I read. But I have to admit that what I read is somewhat disturbing to me. As an adoptive parent of a son from Vietnam and in process for another son, I am concerned about the state of adoptions from Vietnam. We both know (I hope) that the world of international adoptions is not always as neat and tidy and ethical as it should be. There is a lot of money that changes hands and large amounts of money don't always bring out the best in people. Unethical agencies use this to their advantage. By paying "unpublished" fees, their timelines can be significantly shortened. Those of us who chose our agency because of their unwillingness to pay any such fees wait for a much longer time to bring our children home. This is not because we don't want them home as soon as possible, but because we want to be able to say to our children, when they ask about their adoptions, that we did everything as honorably an...

(E) As has been mentioned before, nearly our entire family is involved in our homeschool theater group's production of Oliver! With the performances less than two weeks away, it seems as if all of our attention and energy has been consumed by it. And while finding props, making costumes, locating appropriate footwear, and hounding friends to be in the audience is time-consuming , the thing that makes us realize that our lives have been overtaken, is the continual soundtrack running through each family member's brain. With eight people living together, you can be sure that at any given moment at least one person will be humming/whistling/singing a selection. (This is sometimes cute, in a slightly embarrasing sort of way...such as when both TM and D spent our entire time in the grocery store singing a medley at the top of their lungs. I worry only a little bit what people think when they hear my obviously adopted son singing about how "all he ever gets is gruel". ...

(E) While I am told the above referenced show is exciting, the Curry version of the last 24 hours is about as exciting as I care to get. Last night, as we were finishing getting dinner on the table we hear a cry from the other room. Since someone always seems to be falling/tripping/stubbing toes/or otherwise becoming injured in minor ways, we thought nothing of it. But this time it involved blood...and quite a bit of it. TM had somehow fallen and hit his ear against the corner of a wall. J saw the injury first and promptly announced that he was taking TM to the ER. I was at least slightly prepared then for what I saw when I looked at TM's ear. His ear looked as if someone had taken scissors and cut from the outside edge, straight in. Basically, his ear was ripped in two, and we got a unique interior view of the ear's cartilage. It was bad . Eldest daughter M. gamely took over feeding everyone else dinner and we went to the hospital. Body parts cut in half evidently g...

(E) Our youngest, D, continues to be in the running for the most charming child in the world contest. D loves everyone and everyone (so far) loves him. He is usually happy and has quite a gift for making a person feel comfortable, loved, and appreciated. (Not bad for a three year old.) And he can always make me smile. This morning as I was finishing getting dressed, he announced to me, "Oh, are you going to wear a necklace, Mommy? You will look so pretty!" He will often compliment me on my clothing choices, "That is a pretty outfit, Mommy." But the classic statement from D, which is the favorite of the whole family, is when he walks up to a family member and announces (D always announces, never just says) "I like you!" How can you not love that? A side benefit, apart from just getting to live with this little, cheery person, is that he is starting to rub off on TM. TM will happily re-announce whatever pronouncement his brother has made and recentl...

(E) I've been thinking a lot about attachment recently, mainly because of a recurrence of raging by TM. For a while, the raging had almost stopped. We would see one every few weeks and they were pretty tame. But in the past week or so, it is almost as if we are back in Vietnam. The raging is back to being long, physical, and often. So, I've been doing what I always do when confronted by a problem, I read and research, this time on attachment. Now I had done a lot of reading on attachment before we adopted TM, but there is nothing like experiencing something first hand to add a bit of focus. Attachment can be a somewhat fuzzy subject. For instance, different sources of information have different lists of what might be signals of attachment problems. On one list, TM is perfectly fine. He has none of the behaviors listed. While this may be reassuring at first, how are other things explained? Those worries that sit in the back of your head and cause uneasiness. Finding some of TM...