TM's Lifebook
I finally did it. I completed TM's lifebook after saying I was going to do it for the past 1 1/2 years. It was a surprisingly difficult thing to do. Not the putting together part...putting pictures and text on a page isn't that difficult...but the emotional part. I knew everything that went in it; there was no new information about TM's early life that was surprising to me. But I also hadn't visited all this information in a conscious way for quite a while. There were two things that struck me. First, TM is now more my son than he was the last time I really thought about his background in more than a cursory way. All those early events didn't just happen to some child, they happened to my son. Looking at his (very cute) baby pictures, I'm overwhelmed with the desire to go back in time and scoop him up and save him from so much. But I can't. It's his history and I can't go back and change it no matter how much I want to. Second, I am struck once again