Ordinary Time

K. being served with a court summons to appear in adoption court. Well, we did it. We all woke up in time to be dressed, breakfasted, and out the door by 6:45 am. We caught an express train downtown and even had enough extra time to grab a cup of coffee on the way to the courthouse. The whole thing was almost a non-event. We arrived, signed the papers our attorney had for us and then waited a bit. Then it was downstairs to the sheriff's office so K. could be handed his court summons. A couple of pictures and plastic badges later and were back upstairs in the family waiting room to appear in court. K. playing in the waiting room. After waiting for a while (the family waiting room was well supplied with toys), we were called into the court room. The judge was very nice and our children answered his questions. (Some members of our family are still refining their people skills, so this was an achievement.) It took all of five minutes and we were done. Unfortunately, Cook County does no

L. on left, G. on right I've been wearing the babies in the sling when I've gone out with them recently. (It's so much easier than strapping them into their car seats and strapping the car seats onto the stroller frame. Plus the stroller is huge!) But I haven't quite become used to the stir we cause when we are out. I am stopped very frequently by people wanting to admire them or ask questions about them. I really don't mind showing them off, but it makes it difficult to do anything quickly. J. and went to the grocery store(s) yesterday and I was stopped nearly every aisle. One of the checkers even wanted to take their picture. When it is just J. and I out with the girls, no one asks how many children we have...I think they just assume they are our firsts. But we often get the questions when we have other children with us. I try to avoid this question because people's reactions can get tiresome. Often people will try to say something along the lines

So, what would you do? Next Wednesday is our court date to readopt K. When we did TM's readoption, all of us trooped downtown to be a part of it. This time I can't quite decide if I'm up for that. Here are the pros and cons: Pros to taking everyone: We have a picture of all of us at TM's readoption and it would be nice to have that for K. It is a family event after all. The younger ones would love a chance to ride the 'El'. Even if J. and I just take K. and the babies, we would still need to ride the 'El' anyway since I can't imagine parking our van downtown. There would be more hands to hold babies while we wait around the court house. Cons to taking everyone: We have to be downtown by 8 am, which means we would need to be walking out the door with everyone between 6:30 and 6:45 AM. We would have to pay a lot more in train fare. Keeping track of 7 children (the babies will be in the sling, so don't need to be kept track of) on the train at r

A. has been gone since last Sunday on a vacation with a friend. She was invited to go up to Door County, WI as a companion for her friend since she (the friend) is an only child. It sounds as though she is having a wonderful time. But I'm missing her. You would think that with 8 other children at home I would hardly notice when one is missing, but that's not the case. When one (or more) of my children are off somewhere else there is a huge hole in our family. It always feels as though more people are missing than really are. Each member has such an integral place that it doesn't matter who is still here, the empty spot left by the missing member is blatantly obvious. A. comes back late on Sunday; we will all be glad. Since I've been thinking about A., I thought this would be a good time to show off the dolls she made for G. and L. before they were born. A. made these all by herself...she found the instructions, gathered the supplies and made them without any he

Now that I'm not pregnant and am starting to function again, I can start to work on K.'s readoption. I had wanted to do it earlier...perhaps before the girls were born. But by the time I had saved the money, I realized there was no way I could manage to get myself down to the courthouse in Chicago. It would have involved too much walking. So now we'll be going with two babies in tow instead. I've spent some time gathering the adoption documents the lawyer needs and will fax them to her today. (Am I the only one who is paranoid about these documents? I have them tucked away in a fire proof safe which no one else opens, but yet every so often I feel compelled to look at them just to make sure they are all still there. As if in the dead of night the papers will hatch an escape plan and disappear.) Of course all the documents were there where I left them. It will be a relief to get this step done. Then all that is left is K.'s US passport and to change his nam

G. on left and L. on right The girls are now a month old. Actually they were a month old on Wednesday, but I never got around to posting. (My laundry, though, is completely caught up for the first time in 9 months!) They are gradually starting to wake up during the day and to sleep better at night. Night before last they both were up just once, one right after the other. It was the most sleep I've had in a long time. The problem is once they do that a time or two, one starts to expect it. And then they have a night like last night where they each slept just once. At least it's what it felt like. When I just couldn't nurse anymore, J. took them both downstairs and the three of them watched Monty Python DVD's while I got a little sleep. I'm not sure the girls really appreciated Monty Python. L. fell asleep and G. just cried. Everyone asks us if they are identical. The fact is, we don't know. To know for certain, a blood test would need to be done. The more I l

This will work for a while, until they get too big. And really, G. likes the sling after we get moving. See...

I've been thinking a lot about this recently as we have been the beneficiaries of so many wonderful meals from friends, family, neighbors, and church members. We are heading into our fourth week of having more meals provided for us than we have had to prepare. It has been such a blessing and has allowed us to focus on G. and L. and not worry so much about dinner. I have to admit that sometimes it is a challenge for me to graciously accept the gifts of others without feeling guilty. If you haven't guessed by now, I'm something of a perfectionist and often feel as though I need to do everything myself. But as my grandmother often told me, we need to learn to be good receivers and not just good givers. I love to take meals to others or be able to help them in some way, and I have to remind myself that others feel the same way and I need to allow them the joy that comes from helping others. Bringing a meal to someone, whether because of a new baby or an illness or a death

Last Thursday, G. and L. had their first pediatrician appointment. I had an uneasy feeling about it, but didn't know why. It turns out I had a reason to feel uneasy, because when the girls were weighed, they had yet to gain back their birth weights, and L. was even under her hospital discharge weight. The doctor wanted us to supplement with formula, which I was not wild about doing. While it would help the girls pack on calories, it would do nothing for my milk supply, and I desperately wanted to nurse these babies. After having a (not so) minor breakdown...gotta love those post-partum hormones...I talked to a good friend who has La Leche leader training. After discussing the girls' nursing with her, I realized that they were not as good of nursers as I thought they were. So over the weekend I did several things: paid much closer attention to how they were nursing so they were getting as much milk as possible; upped my calorie and protein intake (a lot); drank fenugreek

(TM and L.) Three years ago today, half way across the world, TM became our son. While we celebrate the fact that he joined our family, today is not necessarily a day of celebration because of all the pain and grief that the transition caused TM. When you're 3 1/2, you may understand the words that people are telling you, but what it really means to suddenly have a new mommy and daddy is beyond comprehension. This is particularly true when you have been happily living with people you thought of as 'Mommy' and 'Daddy' and can't remember anything or anyone else. We were the interlopers. We were the ones taking TM away from everyone he knew and loved for what seemed to him no discernible reason. You can't explain to a 3 year old about being a ward of the state or about having no permanent place. All you can do is what you think is best and watch as the child grieves. And because TM grieved by raging, we found it difficult even to grieve with him. The best we c