Unstructured time

I often discuss homeschooling with people who are curious about it, whether it is something they think might be good for their family or because they are just curious. One of the benefits I often mention that comes with homeschooling is how efficient this style of education is. We are always done with our formal learning by lunchtime and then the rest of the day is free for just pursuing individual interests or classes or field trips or whatever. This schedule has been our family's life for... always. It is how my children grew up, this knowing that entertainment or direction did not come from me after lunch. This large amount of discretionary time was a huge factor when W. was decided whether or not to attend the public high school. Ultimately he couldn't imagine giving that up which would have been required along with attendance at the school just by its very nature. So by the time my children hit middle school and high school, they are all pretty adept at filling their time. Are they sometimes bored or at loose ends? Sure, but it is often temporary and I spend little to no time managing their boredom for them. Well, outside of making helpful suggestions such as "You could clean the kitchen [bathroom, bedroom, etc.]"

When they were all younger, I would be a bit more proactive with more supportive suggestions as they learned to fill their time. I created the "I Don't Know What to Do" binder, where I had collected dozens of games and crafts and activities from a variety of sources. They had (still have, actually) constant access to raw materials for building, drawing, painting, creating. There were books. Book literally everywhere either to read or be inspired by. And there were a lot of open ended toys where there was no single script for how they should be played. And games and puzzles and a backyard and recorded stories and... You get the idea.

All of this creates a family culture of learning and exploration and self-directed activity. In a recent conversation, I was caught off guard when asked what my children do with their free time. I was caught off guard because it is just not something any of us thinks about, it is just living life. So I thought I would share a list of some of the things my children have occupied themselves in the recent past.

• Reading (fiction)
• Drawing
• Painting
• Baking
• Taking the dog for a walk
• Walking in the forest preserve
• Sculpting with clay
• Building with block (yes, even my teens still build with blocks now and then)
• Spinning on a spindle
• Watching documentaries
• Listening to podcasts on topics they are interested
• Listening to recorded books
• Playing with the guinea pig
• Taking photographs
• Catching up on schoolwork they didn't finish in the morning
• Playing with the cats
• Knitting
• Making things out of cardboard
• Playing games
• Doing puzzles
• Reading non-fiction
• Reading magazines
• Daydreaming
• Writing stories
• Playing musical instruments
• Taking a nap
• Playing video games 
• Doing laundry
• Listening to NPR
• Looking at maps
• Going to the library
• Going to youth group
• Helping with dinner
• Cleaning (yes, often a child [they'll all do this at one time or another] will just clean up the kitchen)
• Riding bikes into town
• Help doing the grocery shopping

I'm sure there is more, but this is what comes to mind. My point is that there is a lot of learning in those unstructured hours. It is as beneficial, in my opinion, as the formal learning we do in the mornings. It is also just a part of our lives.

But what if this idea of free, discretionary time is new? It's going to take some practice. You're going to need to provide support as your child figures out how to fill their time, how to be interested in things, how to navigate boredom. Personally, I think these are life skills that are vital to being an adult. How many adults struggle with how to fill their unstructured time? I think quite a few. I also think that our epic pandemic of busyness is not because we like to appear important, though that is probably a piece of it, but because if one is busy, has scheduled their time with activities from morn 'till night, then there is no need to struggle with how to be content by oneself. And without that time to think, rest, pursue interests, read, learn, we become fatigued and depressed because we have become a stranger to ourselves. It's hard to know someone who is always busy. 

Unstructured time is a gift, not some educational failing. And even if you choose traditional school (which is fine, I hope you know... families are each different), do try to carve out free time for you and for your children. Give them the gift of figuring out how to fill their time and get to know themselves.