Assumptions and unexpected blessings
I've been a little horse crazy from the time I was a girl. I read about horses; I played with toy horses; I drew horses; I put pictures of horses all over my walls; and eventually my parents gave me horseback riding lessons. All of this was great, but it didn't give me the one thing I desperately wanted: my own horse. (My dream horse was a grey Arabian. I don't think it's a coincidence that my first horse is a grey Arabian. God is good.) I was convinced as a child that if I didn't get a horse then, when I was still a child, it wasn't going to count somehow. That being an adult and having a horse wasn't even close to the same thing. It might be good, but it wouldn't be as great.
I'm sure this came from an assumption that adults just didn't have as much fun as children. That they were such different beings that it wasn't the same experience as being a child. I'm also sure that it's because I knew very few adults who actually rode. Therefore, in my mind, adults didn't really ride horses. I was going to miss out on something, I just knew it, if the horse didn't appear. Even getting a horse as a teenager (which also didn't happen), to my mind, was somehow pushing the limits and not quite as good as having a horse as an actual kid.
Well, I didn't get the horse, and the world didn't end. It's probably a really good thing that my ten year old self didn't know I would have to wait another 42 years. That kind of foreknowledge is just a little too depressing.
I now have a horse. I do love having a horse. I have learned that it is just as much fun having a horse as an adult as it would have been as a child. Probably more fun because the horse is at my house and not boarded at a stable I would have had to badger my parents to drive me to all the time. But I've discovered something else about having a horse as an adult that I wasn't anticipating. I get to share having this horse with my children.
My children do get to have the experience of having a horse, and to share that with them is very, very sweet. This morning, as I was getting ready to go out to the barn, G. asks me if she could come and help. She came out and did some mucking, got Emmy hay, and gave her her grain. I love being able to share this with my child. I can't wait for P. to come home and be able to share it with her, too.
As I think about what I wanted as a child and what I have now, if feels as though I have been doubly blessed. Not only do I have what I longed for for so long, but I can give that gift to my children as well. I almost cannot decide which makes me more excited.
And truly, there is little better than to have G. come up to me this afternoon and ask, "Can I help you with Emmy tomorrow, too?"
I'm sure this came from an assumption that adults just didn't have as much fun as children. That they were such different beings that it wasn't the same experience as being a child. I'm also sure that it's because I knew very few adults who actually rode. Therefore, in my mind, adults didn't really ride horses. I was going to miss out on something, I just knew it, if the horse didn't appear. Even getting a horse as a teenager (which also didn't happen), to my mind, was somehow pushing the limits and not quite as good as having a horse as an actual kid.
Well, I didn't get the horse, and the world didn't end. It's probably a really good thing that my ten year old self didn't know I would have to wait another 42 years. That kind of foreknowledge is just a little too depressing.
I now have a horse. I do love having a horse. I have learned that it is just as much fun having a horse as an adult as it would have been as a child. Probably more fun because the horse is at my house and not boarded at a stable I would have had to badger my parents to drive me to all the time. But I've discovered something else about having a horse as an adult that I wasn't anticipating. I get to share having this horse with my children.
My children do get to have the experience of having a horse, and to share that with them is very, very sweet. This morning, as I was getting ready to go out to the barn, G. asks me if she could come and help. She came out and did some mucking, got Emmy hay, and gave her her grain. I love being able to share this with my child. I can't wait for P. to come home and be able to share it with her, too.
As I think about what I wanted as a child and what I have now, if feels as though I have been doubly blessed. Not only do I have what I longed for for so long, but I can give that gift to my children as well. I almost cannot decide which makes me more excited.
And truly, there is little better than to have G. come up to me this afternoon and ask, "Can I help you with Emmy tomorrow, too?"
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