Large families go to the movies
The younger people have been going through a spurt of watching all of our large family movies. You know the ones... Cheaper by the Dozen; Yours, Mine, and Ours (both old and new), that sort of thing. I have been amused by their reactions.
They have absolutely loved them. I would say it's because they enjoy watching movies about families that are similar to their own, but I'm not sure that's it. I think it's just because they're funny. I say that because, they have also mentioned more than once that we should have as many children as they do in those movies. Basic counting evidently needs to be added back into the curriculum, because at the time they were watching Cheaper by the Dozen, the one about the family with 12 children. Like ours. They all seemed surprised when I pointed out that movie family had the same number of people that ours does.
It just goes to show what I've been saying all along. Being a part of a large family really doesn't feel any different from being in a smaller one. It is when you are outside looking in, that it can feel a bit overwhelming. I've decided that it is because when you are not a part of it, you just don't know all the members that well. It's hard to keep names and faces straight, what age everyone is, what they like or don't like, whether you should try to talk to certain people when they are hungry or not. Twelve or fourteen people you are not entirely sure about feels like a lot more people than twelve or fourteen people you know really well.
I haven't been watching the movies with them, but will poke my head in every so often. These are the movies I adored when I was younger and dreamed of living in a larger family. I know them well. It is a bit different to view them as the mother of a dozen, though. Yesterday they were watching the old Yours, Mine, and Ours with Lucille Ball and Henry Fonda. It was the scene where Henry Fonda's children are meeting Lucille Ball for the first time and are none too happy about it. I happened to glance in because there are some funny bits. It wasn't the humor of the moment that I noticed, or even Henry Fonda's extremely well-stocked liquor supply. No, it was the four (FOUR!) ovens in the kitchen. He plays the widower with ten children. I can tell you, no one needs four ovens. Not even the parents of ten children. I currently have ten at home, and we are functioning pretty well with one oven. (Would I like a second one? Yes, I would, but except once or twice, we have managed just fine without one.) This was evidently a case of the set designer imagining what raising ten children must be like and creating the set to match that imagining. Four ovens? I wanted more close-ups of the kitchen to see what else had been put in there, but the movie wasn't cooperating.
As much as I enjoy these movies, they are all based on the assumption that large families are somehow intrinsically different from families with two or three children. It's just not the case. We're not different, we are just more. More laundry and more food, more voices, more relationships, more unique personalities, maybe a little more chaos, but certainly a lot more love.
They have absolutely loved them. I would say it's because they enjoy watching movies about families that are similar to their own, but I'm not sure that's it. I think it's just because they're funny. I say that because, they have also mentioned more than once that we should have as many children as they do in those movies. Basic counting evidently needs to be added back into the curriculum, because at the time they were watching Cheaper by the Dozen, the one about the family with 12 children. Like ours. They all seemed surprised when I pointed out that movie family had the same number of people that ours does.
It just goes to show what I've been saying all along. Being a part of a large family really doesn't feel any different from being in a smaller one. It is when you are outside looking in, that it can feel a bit overwhelming. I've decided that it is because when you are not a part of it, you just don't know all the members that well. It's hard to keep names and faces straight, what age everyone is, what they like or don't like, whether you should try to talk to certain people when they are hungry or not. Twelve or fourteen people you are not entirely sure about feels like a lot more people than twelve or fourteen people you know really well.
I haven't been watching the movies with them, but will poke my head in every so often. These are the movies I adored when I was younger and dreamed of living in a larger family. I know them well. It is a bit different to view them as the mother of a dozen, though. Yesterday they were watching the old Yours, Mine, and Ours with Lucille Ball and Henry Fonda. It was the scene where Henry Fonda's children are meeting Lucille Ball for the first time and are none too happy about it. I happened to glance in because there are some funny bits. It wasn't the humor of the moment that I noticed, or even Henry Fonda's extremely well-stocked liquor supply. No, it was the four (FOUR!) ovens in the kitchen. He plays the widower with ten children. I can tell you, no one needs four ovens. Not even the parents of ten children. I currently have ten at home, and we are functioning pretty well with one oven. (Would I like a second one? Yes, I would, but except once or twice, we have managed just fine without one.) This was evidently a case of the set designer imagining what raising ten children must be like and creating the set to match that imagining. Four ovens? I wanted more close-ups of the kitchen to see what else had been put in there, but the movie wasn't cooperating.
As much as I enjoy these movies, they are all based on the assumption that large families are somehow intrinsically different from families with two or three children. It's just not the case. We're not different, we are just more. More laundry and more food, more voices, more relationships, more unique personalities, maybe a little more chaos, but certainly a lot more love.
Comments
Large families are inherently louder and more chaotic than small families. There are simply more people in less space making noise. Someone is always having some small crisis, and since most space is shared, there's no where to go to escape. For a quiet, sensitive kid like I was, this is miserable.
Large families are much harder to organize. They have more stuff, and with so many people, nothing stays put away in the same place for more than a day or so. Searching the house for a needed item is a common occurrence. For someone who loves order, this is also miserable.
As for more love? Well, that wasn't my experience. Try more interpersonal conflict and more opportunities for misunderstanding.
I live alone now, and I love it. I don't ever plan to go back to living with a large number of people. You may enjoy it, because you chose it. However, kids in large families don't get a choice, and some of them feel very differently about the experience.