In which I have a brief pity party

This morning I ran out and did a small bit of Christmas shopping. Thanks to a gift card from one friend and a great discount card from another I was able to get a couple of items that I wouldn't otherwise have been able to purchase this year. (I need to be a bit cryptic since all my children read the blog.) As a result I found myself in a department store. A type of place, I might add, that I haven't been in for several years. I was successful in my venture, but then I decided to just look around for a bit since I was there. I had heard that there were some great deals in the children's department, so that's where I headed. This was my mistake. I didn't really need any clothes for my children. Some girls in my family have so many clothes that their dresser drawers sometimes don't shut. (Though this could also be a folding, as opposed to an amount, problem.) But there I was anyway, looking at baby girl clothes. Really cute baby girl clothes. Baby girl clothes which would be absolutely adorable on my already adorable baby girls. But alas, none of them was marked down quite enough to cause me to take out my checkbook. This was when I decided to go home, feeling quite sorry for myself that I couldn't buy whatever I wanted whenever I wanted to.

By the time I arrived home, I had given myself a stern talking to, spent some time counting my blessings, and regained most of my good sense. The whole experience reminded me of why I avoid malls, stores, and catalogues. If I am not aware of everything that is out there to buy, I am perfectly happy with what I have. I have plenty and don't really need anything. And often, my want list is actually fairly short as well. I would venture to say, I spend more time feeling as though I have too much and work to get rid of it than feeling like I need more. But...there is nothing like browsing through a store with all the shiny, new, exciting things on display to create a sense of discontentment. And it doesn't take long. I was in the store for less than an hour, but that was all it took to make me feel as though my lot in life wasn't very good.

I had thought that I had become immune to the ploys of marketers. My experience this morning teaches me otherwise. I will go back to vigilantly guarding what I let my mind focus on, because I discover it is all to easy to focus on my perceived lack instead of focusing on my abundant wealth.