SAD

I've lived in the Midwest for 44 winters which is far longer than the first 18 I spent in the desert. Yet those first years are impressionable ones, it seems, because there is always the very small part of me which thinks that near the middle to end of January, spring should start arriving. This is disappointing if you are in the upper Midwest because spring is most definitely not arriving at this time. Not only is it not arriving, but the worst weather of the season could still be on its way. 

Over the years I've gotten better about managing my expectations, but the cold weather and short days were still extremely difficult. I was never officially diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder, but I have no doubt that it was part of my life from mid-January until the weather improved and the days grew lighter. 

That was before horses.

I realized the other day that since I have been taking care of horses I haven't felt the same mid-winter despair and ennui. While I'm sure part of it is the horses themselves, because horses are like that, I think there is another reason. When we lived in Evanston, there would be days at a stretch when I didn't have to go outside. It was cold outside, why should I venture out? It felt cozier to stay inside where it was warm(er). Sure, I knew the advice that if you struggled with your mood in winter that you should get outside regularly, but when it is crazy cold, it is very difficult to get yourself outside just for the heck of it. Plus, once I was outside, there wasn't a whole lot to do, particularly since I couldn't just leave all the little people at home and go take a walk to the lake. (And bundling up the little people and force marching them in the cold to the lake did not sound as though it was going to do anything for my mood.)

Here, with horses outside? I have to go outside even on the worst days because the horses need me to. I need to feed them and take care of them and clean their stalls. By the time I'm done, I have usually spent at least 45 minutes outside and often have worked up a sweat. As much as I don't want to leave the warmth of the house every morning, once I have been outside for ten minutes or so, I am glad I did. The winter landscape is beautiful. There are dozens of birds to watch. It feels good to be moving outside. And after having been moving outside it feels good to come inside, too. Multiply this by two or three times a day, every day, during the winter. Even today I noticed that the days are definitely starting to get longer and I was aware of much more sunlight hanging around at the end of they day. My mistaken assumption from my town life that there was no light to be had until mid-March at the earliest was totally mistaken. 

This realization has really just snuck up on me recently. I was aware that winter here felt significantly easier than it did in Evanston, but hadn't really spent time thinking about exactly how much different it felt. It is somewhat ironic because winter here with outside animals is a heck of a lot more work, and we don't have a choice as to whether we will stay inside of or not. 

The short version of this? People really are not meant to be inside and sedentary and that being outside and moving really is good for you. 

It also doesn't hurt when the weather warms up a bit and your hydrant unfreezes. 



Comments

jan ranger said…
it is same for me living on little farm. once i am out, i am happy to be out! invigorating. and then inside feels even more toasty than before i
went out. and earmuffs alone make me much happier to hang in the barn 😊
jan ranger said…
*then before? than before? it is too late to ponder or even look it up. homeschool mom grammar paranoia

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