The Tale of the Three Frying Pans
Once upon a time there was a husband and a wife. They were very happy. Because there was only two of them, they used a little frying pan and ate very well.
Then some children came along. They were still very happy, but had to use a bigger frying pan to feed everyone.
Yet more children joined the growing family and even the large frying pan became too small. A bigger one must be found in order for everyone to have enough food.
The not-so-little family now eats well again and are happy with their very large frying pan. And they lived happily ever after. (Except they still can't have risotto because even the very large frying pan can't hold enough to feed all 11 of them.)
... which is why I became so excited while idly thumbing through one of the masses of catalogues arriving at our home when I saw the 20 inch frying pan. (Go ahead, get out a ruler and see how big that is. The largest frying pan above is a mere 14 inches.) I could make risotto again because I would have enough for everyone. And then I saw the description. They were selling the very-very-large frying pan as an expensive gag gift, because underneath appeared these words, "hilariously oversized"! I have already shared how our family is 'outside acceptable parameters', and now I think I will have to add, 'hilariously oversized'.
(Hey, does anyone have any great tips as to how to clean stainless steel stoves in order to remove the what seems to be permanently burned-on stains?)