Friday, May 15, 2015

FAQ's

Since I've spent the day alternately working on getting ready for A.'s party tomorrow and trying to encourage (coerce? badger? demand?) the house full of children to help, I have to resort to an easy blog post.

Since we have made our announcement about Y., I have received some questions and since some of them seem to be along the same lines, I thought I would answer them here.

1. Are they sisters? To clarify, I'm pretty sure anyone who has asked me this means, "Are they biologically related?" The answer to this question is, no, they are not. As a point of education (and please don't take this the wrong way, because I haven't been offended), this question is one of the top vote receivers for annoying question asked of adoptive families. Usually this becomes an annoyance when the children are already in their family because it implies that the adoptive relationships are less "real" than the biological ones. My standard response (and that of many others) is to reply, "They are now." Usually this is enough to satisfy someone, but I have had a person push and reply, "No, you know what I mean." Hmmm... yes I do, I was giving you the information I was willing to share.

2. Do they live in the same city? No, they don't. The cities they are from (Urumqi in Xingiang and Zhengzhou in Henan) are about 1800 miles apart. We will have to visit both cities in succession when we finally get to travel.

3. Have they ever met each other? No, they haven't.

4. Do they know they are being adopted? Not yet. I will send care packages to them including a photo book introducing our family once we have our Letter of Acceptance... which will be a while yet.

5. When will you get to travel? That's the big question, isn't it? Since we are still waiting for the last piece of our dossier, your guess is as good as mine. The general rule of thumb right now is 4 -6 months once your dossier has been logged-in. We are more than a few weeks away from that milestone, I think.

6. Who will travel with you? Well, that is still in the deciding stages. We certainly know who wants to go and we know who will be in college and won't be able to go. The rest will depend significantly on finances. While we have found it incredibly helpful to have another child with us to ease the transition of the new child, it is not an inexpensive thing to bring extra children along. I hope we can manage it.

Did I miss any? These are the ones I have heard a lot recently. Add your questions if I didn't answer it.

4 comments:

Kelly said...

You get to go to Urumqi! That area has such a fascinating history. Have you read Oracle Bones by Peter Hessler? He talks about the Uighurs and how they don't consider themselves Chinese (though China clearly disagrees, hence the unrest there.) I hope you will post lots of pictures from there for me!

To China and Back said...

Oh, if you are with Holt, you are going to love your guide in Zhengzhou! And go to Shaolin Temple if you can while you're there.

Zhengzhou can be very dusty depending on the time of year, so you might consider bringing face masks with you. We needed them once we were there and it was a little challenge to find them. We were there in May.

thecurryseven said...

To China and Back... we're actually using CCAI for this adoption (though we used Holt for our Vietnamese adoptions.) H. is from Henan, so this will be a repeat trip for us. We'll get to see the lovely yellow sky of ZZ once again. :-)

e

thecurryseven said...

And I guess I rarely comment on my own blog. For how long has the capta-thing been testing all of you with pictures?! Most annoying.

e

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